Finally I have something to write and mind you this is a real incident.
So on April 1, 2008 at around 3:11 am I receive a call from some number. I won’t give it away here for reasons given later but suffice to say that it had a 9936 prefix. So this call is from a girl who is distressed and she says, ” Aap kyun mujhe pareshaan kar rahe hai baar baar message aur phone karke. Me aapse baat nahi karna chahti. Mere bhaiya ko pata lag gaya to mera to jo hona hai hoga par aap ko bhi…aapko bhi kuchh ho jayega (and some more stuff I don’t remember).”
While this girl is speaking this I am thinkin – Finally some bandi called me. I am trying to talk to her but she continues speaking (for reasons I came to know later) without listening to me. So while she is speaking the aforementioned statement:
Me: Madam kaun ho ap. Raat me 3 baje koi aur mila nahi aapko (But she continues) Kaun ho yaar…pehle pareshaan karne to do fir bhai se baat karvaana.
Her brother approaches now. I can hear his voice on the cell. He is saying something like: “Kaun hai?”
She: Bhaiya yeh lo aap baat karo
Biraadar: Kaun hai be tu. Kyun pareshaan kar raha hai. Teri…tera number to mil hi gaya hai mujhe.
Me: Achha tareeka hai raat me 3 baje April fool banane ka.
Biraadar (ignores the April fool comment for reasons I came to know later): Abe tera number mil gaya hai mujhe. Naam kya hai tera?
Me: Naam jaan ke kya karoge. Behen ke shaadi ke card pe chhapega tab padh lena.
Biraadar: Naam to tera nikalva hi loonga me ab.
Me: Theek hai nikalva lena.
And the line goes dead. I am sitting on my chair thinking whether I should laugh on this or be worried. Then I think…maa chudaaye…April 1 hai and somebody tried to get the better of me. But I am still worried now as I write this. If I am found wounded or dead a few days from now then this might be the Biraadar cracking down on me and I don’t know what to do about this. I am not disclosing the number here because I don’t want that girl in trouble.
Cya if I live through this,
Onion
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476488
Italicized version can be considered my simple attempt at April fool. Beware of such callers though. The one that I received was a prerecorded clip and hence there was no reaction to what I was speaking to them. But you can get a call from real pranksters. Don’t lose it…give the pranksters some space
Enjoy the April Fools’ Day.
So long,
Onion